I was running late for my 7 a.m. flight from Denver to Charlotte, en route to the Type-A Mom Conference in Asheville, North Carolina. First, the shuttle from my airport-area hotel was 12 minutes late. Then TSA found a 5-oz tube of facial cleanser at the bottom of my backpack (I’d been looking for that soap for weeks!). I didn’t want to toss the nearly full container, so I took the time to empty it into smaller bottles I had with me. Going back through security took at least another 5 valuable minutes.
But my morning was pie compared to the man I met at gate C-31.
As I made my way to the jetway with the cattle herd of other folks with Zone 4 (last) seating, a handsome, 40-something man in jeans, hiking shoes and graying, closely cropped hair approached. “Is this the plane to Charlotte?” Yes. “Did I miss Zone 3 seating?” Yes. He attempted to blend in with the crowd, and I was annoyed, “Hey, you were here late,” I thought, but didn’t say. “Move to the back of the line.”
Instead, I ushered him in front of me, saying, “We’re all going to the same place.” A few moments passed, and he said to no one in particular, “I just totaled my car.”
Whaaaaa?
Turns out he left his home in the Denver-area foothills early – at 5 a.m. – so he could take his time driving to the airport to catch his flight. Instead he hit an elk (“a 10 pointer”) on Interstate 70, deploying the airbag.
The lanky kid with the guitar next to me piped up, “That was you? I saw that elk. It was huge!”
State police responded quickly. The front of the Toyota 4-runner was smashed – the car was totaled. A woman in the car behind the accident pulled over and offered to drive the gentleman to the airport – she’d just won $1200 at the Blackhawk Casino. What a juxtaposition of two strangers – one celebrating her good luck and one dealing with the consequences of crummy luck.
The man in front of me in the boarding line was certainly on edge, but composed. A little jittery, but not falling apart. I said, “I can’t believe you made it here, for the flight.”
“I had to,” the man said, “I haven’t seen my parents in 10 months. I couldn’t call them to say I wasn’t coming.”
He didn’t want to disappoint his mom and dad. That brought tears to my eyes.
And I was embarrassed – I was annoyed at this guy for wanting to “cut me” in line, when he’d had such a traumatic morning.
Ironically, in my carry-on was a book, Step Back from the Baggage Claim, that I devoured on my two-hour flight. The author, Jason Barger, explains how small changes we might make in the way we behave in an airport, can help improve how we, as a society, can change the world for the better.
Heavy stuff. But so simple. And so right on.
One of the lessons in this short book – based on Jason’s insights gleaned from spending 7 days in 6 different U.S. airports – is to “share compassion with those along your journey.” Jason notes, “We have no idea what tugs at the hearts of the people we sit next to on the airplane, stand next to in security lines, bump into in the food court or box out in baggage claim.”
We don’t know what metaphorical baggage people are carrying with them as they make their way through their days … instead of getting annoyed at folks who want to “cut the line” (!), why not “travel gracefully,” as Jason suggests, with a smile on your face and and kind words and gestures for everyone you meet.
I sure felt lousy after I found out about the incredibly crummy morning my fellow passenger had. And after reading Step Back from the Baggage Claim, that message of sharing compassion sure hit home. (Here’s a more thorough review this thoroughly inspiring book on the Practical Travel Gear blog.)
I sure hope the mystery man can find peace during his visit with his folks – and that he’s got a great insurance company and he can replace his car soon.
Travel gracefully!
Photo courtesy Colorado.com, Matt Inden/Weaver Multimedia Group.
Lovely post, Kara. No matter where we are in the airplane lineup, you are quite right, we do get there at the same time!
Regarding civility in airports, in Canada we are having the continuation of an inquiry into the tragic story of a Polish man, Robert Dziekanski, who was killed in the Vancouver airport by police with tasers. It’s a heartbreaking national shame for Canada.
Mr. Dziekanski’s mother waited for hours at the airport for him. She was told he wasn’t in the airport, when in fact he was in the secure zone and apparently didn’t realize he was free to leave. I cannot even write the rest of the details, they make me so sad and at the same time so angry. Nothing that has come out of the inquiry makes sense.
So yes, there are some important reasons to be civil in these seemingly anonymous, meaningless situations.
I was so glad that your fellow passenger made the trip home to his parents.
What a day.
Wow! Great post. I, too, need to remember this when I get a little cranky with the folks who arrive “late” to the airport. I try to arrive 2 hours early.
I leave for Kauai on Monday and will remind myself to travel gracefully. Mahalo.
Great piece Kara. Funny too that you were going to a “Type A Mom” conference as this is where I have trouble traveling with my type A significant other. When she hits the airport, she is ready for battle. Anyone who dares to take an extra inch anywhere had better look out.
If you give a little, you get a lot—and it’s good Karma too. (I must confess though, I do draw the line at those church groups in matching t-shirts who are butting in line just to stay in one giant sea of fellowship.)
At first I smirked to myself that you were headed to a Type A mom conference and were concerned that you were running 5 minutes behind. I’m sure you’re very nice but I honestly thought, “figures”. (Honestly, 5 minutes late sucks for me, too, and I’m not a mom. But I’m definitely type A.)
Anyway, the same melting that you must have felt with the man-who-hit-the-elk came over me by the time I finished your post.
When I find myself judging someone because they’ve done something that annoys me, I try to remind myself that I’ve done the same thing once or twice (or more!) in my life.
Thanks for the really really wonderful reminder that we’re all in this together.
What a story. I love the additional detail about the woman who hit it big at the casino helping out. Just the other day I as on a flight from NYC to Chicago on which it seems every passenger brought the largest allowed carry-on bag aboard the plane. Needless to say, they couldn’t fit everyone’s bag in the overhead bins. As the flight attendant did her best to shift bags around to accommodate the maximum numbers of bags, I was shocked at how rudely some of the passengers treated this woman. I suspect that all of the people trying to save money by next checking bags result in a lot of extra work and stress for the flight crew.
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